“Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10。“
“Qualifications： No education or experience。“
“I am relatively intelligent， obedient and loyal as a puppy。“
“My compensation should be at least equal to my age。“
“Reason for Leaving： It had to do with the IRS， FBI and SEC。“
“Fired because I fought for lower pay。“
“Size of employer： Very tall， probably over 6‘5“。“
“Please disregard the enclosed resume－it is terribly out of date。“
“Reason for Leaving： My boss said the end of the world is near。“
“Reason for Leaving： The owner gave new meaning to the word ‘paranoia。‘ I prefer to elaborate privately。“